Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
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