I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
You're a college freshman. Its your job to be pathetic. And drunk. But mostly pathetic
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
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