I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
