Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
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