champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
