I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
We're now referring to our nightly Skype time as "strokes of genius." Long distance sucks.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
Randomize