my mouth tastes like poor choices
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Never joke about your clitoris.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
