i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
