new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
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