so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
