When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
Is it penis luge time yet?
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize
