Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Most likely. calling 911 isnt usually something i do the first time i hang out w. someone, but hey. its a good story now.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
Randomize
