FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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