We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
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