sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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