Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
