I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
