I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
