did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
I am coming home with the worst sun burn of my life, two unused condoms, and an unworn slutty dress. Worst. Bachelorette. Party. Ever.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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