Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
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