Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
I found a knife in my bed when I got back this morning. I think one of my roommates has it in for me
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Holy sore nipples Batman
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
