I wish I only lived at night.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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