So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
