Non-Jews are for practice
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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