Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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