You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm serious. I have boob tassles if this is an exchange thing.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We're starting to light shit on fire, bring a metal bucket. Be prepared, Jimmy's off his meds.
Randomize
