why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
Randomize
