so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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