yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
