She said her name was "party"
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
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