problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
His hands were made for my vagina.
this will be a night to untag.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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