On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
