it wasn't lemon gatorade
stumble upon led me to how to make wine in prison, followed by wedding dresses. it knows my life too well
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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