how hairy? two words: wookie tits
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
