he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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