I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
