You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
Randomize
