I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
Randomize
