Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Randomize
