I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
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