see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
