What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
