just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize