I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
i don't think the phrases "so shitty" & "taking care of my newborn" should be combined in the same sentence. leave it to her to make it possible eh?
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