We were both sleeping and she woke up and just puked i feel so bad for everyone around us
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
well after pounding on the ceiling for 5 mins i just went up there to tell them to shut up.. 2 hours later i'm naked, high, lying on their kitchen floor. it escalated so quickly
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
