I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
