THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
I recommend we watch the Super Bowl together and have celebratory sex if we win. Good news is I don't have a team I dislike so were guaranteed a win.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
