walking on gravel proved too much for her barefeet so she traded her bra for some guys sneakers.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Barsexuality is the new black.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Randomize
