try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
We had sex on a dog bed..
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
