my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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